The Not To Do List, free menopause sessions, and missing libidos...

Praise be, my office is no longer akin to a volcanic crater and my face is not melting off!

An apology to start…right after I hit ‘Send’ on last week’s Substack, a kind reader pointed out to me that I had omitted the actual link for the Good Girl Economics research questionnaire - so I am adding it here, there’s still time to take part!

That will teach me to hit send before I do a proper proofread, but I am sure you’re reassured to know that I am only human and do make mistakes…

1. Do you have a Not To Do List?

Scrolling LinkedIn this morning I caught the first ten minutes of a video webinar on productivity with Christine Armstrong (you can catch my interview with her here) and watched while drinking my coffee: one of the suggestions was around cultivating a Not To Do List and it reminded me of this episode with Nat Lue from two years ago, talking about people-pleasing and her book The Joy of Saying No.

What would be on your Not To Do List? Mine currently involves: Ironing, Having a Spotless Kitchen (ditto Bathroom), Joining the PTA (been there, done that for several years, I’ve served my time), Regularly Removing Leg Hair (no-one is going to die if I flash a bit of leg-stubble occasionally), and Stressing that my kids have had the exact same lunchbox items for the last 6 years and counting. There are plenty more, but you get the gist.

What are the things that you are actively choosing not to expend time and energy on? Is it subconscious, or more intentional?

I was at an event on Thursday evening with Noon Founder Eleanor Mills, and in the panel discussion was reminded of this great saying: “What you’re not changing, you’re choosing.”

So thought for the day - “what are you choosing by not changing?”

I’d love to know in the Comments…

2. Free menopause support session from the UCL experts…

The UCL team behind the forthcoming (hopefully) national menopause education programme InTune are running this free session on lunchtime on 23rd July.

Here’s the blurb from the website:

Navigating the transitions of perimenopause and menopause can be a complex and deeply personal journey—both physically and emotionally. This session is designed to inform individuals experiencing these changes, as well as those who want to better understand and support loved ones through them.

We'll explore the signs and stages of perimenopause and menopause, debunk common myths, and provide practical tools to manage symptoms and promote well-being. The event will also address the emotional and relational dynamics that can arise during this phase of life.

Whether you're going through these changes yourself, living, or working with someone who is, or simply want to be more informed, this session offers a welcoming space for learning, sharing, and support.

Topics include

Understanding the stages and symptoms

Mental health and emotional resilience

Lifestyle tips: nutrition, exercise, and sleep

How to talk about menopause with partners, family, and colleagues

If you do go, I’d love to know what you think…

3. Is your libido MIA?

Perimenopause and midlife is peak time for our libidos to go MIA…

This session from one of my fave menopause Drs, Dr Angela Wright, was actually a presentation for other doctors, but if you ignore the technical bits it’s actually a super helpful overview of the ‘biopsychosocial stuff’ that impacts on our libido and things that can help. It’s 42 mins long, but definitely worth a watch if you are struggling, and if you missed my interview with her from last summer, you can catch that here - we cover some similar topics…

Reading this all back I realise it’s quite podcast-recommendation heavy (#sorrynotsorry) but hey…if an episode of Middling Along has really helped you, I’d love a podcast review over on Apple Podcasts…I make absolutely ZERO ££ from doing this, but I love hearing from people when it resonates or helps people navigate perimenopause and midlife…so if you can spare 5 minutes of your Sunday to write a quick review…you’ll make a tired and emotional 52 year old very happy.

Have a wonderful rest of weekend…

Emma

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